List of amazing helpful links and resources.

Websites:

• Babygirls ‘n’ Daddy Doms: Website dedicated to littles, babygirls and Daddy Doms, with a lot of useful information on the subject.
• Collarme: A free BDSM dating website and community, that is probably the most popular and a better option than the commercial alternatives.
• DS Arts: Academy of DS Arts, fairly self explanatory.
• Evil Monk: Ambrosio’s BDSM Website, featuring many useful articles.
• Fetlife: An online BDSM community that I would highly recommend and which is perhaps best described as Facebook for the kinky, allowing users to create a profile, publish photos or writing and join interest groups where you can ask questions.
• Kink Academy: An online resource with many educational and instructional videos on various aspects of BDSM, although users must pay a small fee to access all of the content.
• Submissive Guide: As the name suggests, this is an online resource for submissives.
• The Iron Gate: A general BDSM online resource, with many aticles, essays and even stories on the subject.

Dating and Relationships:

• 10 Principles For Healthy 24/7 D/s And M/s (Source: sexgeek.wordpress.com)
• Difference of Dynamics in BDSM (Source: the-little-kitten.tumblr.com)
• Finding Your Dominant (Source: asubmissivesjourney.com)
• How To Find A Partner (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)
• Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
• Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
• Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 3 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
• So You Want Your Boyfriend To Dominate You (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)
• So Your Girlfriend Wants You To Dominate Her (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)
• The Unfortunate But Common Misconceptions About DD/lg Relationships (Source: a-lolitas-life.tumblr.com)

Play:

• Consent Is Mandatory And Non-Negotiable (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)
• Food Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)
• How (and Why) To Go Down On Your Submissive (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)
• Initial Steps Into Orgasm on Command Training (Source: submissiveguide.com)
• Rules and Tasks for Building Confidence (Source: themostdangerousplaything.tumblr.com)
• Tools of Consent in BDSM (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Training in D/s - Why? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)
• Training in D/s - How? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)
• Training in D/s - Thoughts And Concerns (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)
• Wax Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

Safety:

• Basics Of Safe, Sane And Consensual Power Exchange (Source: Molly Devon / the-iron-gate.com)
• Common Sense (Source: Sean R. Powell / the-iron-gate.com)
• Emotional Safety (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Offline/Online BDSM Safety Rules (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Ouch Is Not A Safe Word: Safe Words, Limits, and Scene Protocol (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Rules For Meeting Strangers (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)
• Safewords and Safesigns 101 (Source: kinkology.tumblr.com)
• S.S.C. VS R.A.C.K. (Source: Justin Medlin / the-iron-gate.com)

Checklists, Communication and Negotiation:

• BDSM Play Partner Check List (Source: Sovereign House / the-iron-gate.com)
• BDSM Scene Negotiations (Source: daddyvinnie.tumblr.com)
• Can I Get That In Writing: Basics of Negotiations (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Communication (Source: submissivesupportgroup.tumblr.com)
• If I Ever See Another Checklist I Will Scream: An Extremely Thorough Play Checklist (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Negotiation Forms (Source: Jay Wiseman, SM 101: A Realistic Introduction / greenerypress.com)
• What Are Negotiations Good For? (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare:

• Aftercare for submissives (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)
• Aftercare for Dominants (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)
• Aftercare for Switches (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)
• Emergency Self-Administered Aftercare (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)
• Sub Drop (Source: David Williams / subshelpingsubs.tripod.com)
• Sub Drop and Aftercare (Source: desires-of-a-domimant-man.tumblr.com)

Dominance and Dominants:

• A Dominant is NOT… (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Advice to a Novice Dom (Source: Washington Sexuality University / the-iron-gate.com)
• Advice to a Novice Dominant (Source: cherhatton.tumblr.com)
• An Open Letter To A Novice Dom (Source: evilmonk.org)
• Qualities of A Successful Dominant (Source: Polly Peachum / the-iron-gate.com)
• Daddy Doms: They’re Not What You Think (Source: edenfantasys.com)
• Domination for Nice Guys (Source: Franklin Veaux / the-iron-gate.com)
• How To Spot A Non Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Learning To Be A Dom (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
• Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
• Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts - Part One: Dominants(Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• The Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• What Is A Daddy Dom? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)
• What Makes A Good Dominant (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)
• What Should A Dominant Be (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Submission and Submissives:

• 10 Considerations For Inexperienced Subs (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)
• A Submissive Bill of Rights (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• A Submissive’s Creed (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• A Submissive’s Ethics (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Introduction To Submission (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)
• Learning to Trust Your Instincts (Source: bewildbetruebekinkybeyou.tumblr.com)
• Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts- Part 2: Submissives/Slaves (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
• Some Rules For The Submissive (Source: daddylookingforhisbaby.tumblr.com)
• Submissive Owner’s Manual (Source: youmadememe.tumblr.com)
• Ten Tips For The Novice, Heterosexual submissive Woman (Source: Jay Wiseman / the-iron-gate.com)
• Warning Signs for Submissives (Source: RC Bauer / the-iron-gate.com)
• What Is A Babygirl? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

Books:

• BDSM: The Naked Truth by Dr Charley Ferrer
• Dear Raven and Joshua: Questions and Answers About Master/Slave Relationships by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera
• Devil in the Details I: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - The Master, The Slave, The Power by LT Morrison
• Devil in the Details II: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Mastery Refine: The Issues, The Skills by LT Morrison
• Devil in the Details III: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Sustainable Structure and Traning by LT Morrison
• Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame, Gloria Brame and Jon Jacobs
• Living M/s: A Book for Masters, slaves and Their Relationships by Dan and Dawn Williams
• Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice by Robert Rubel
• Master/slave Relations: Communications 401 by Robert Rubel
• Master/slave Relations: Solutions 402, Living in Harmony by Robert Rubel
• Protocols: A Variety of Views by Robert Rubel
• Real Service by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera
• Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Phillp Miller and Molly Devon
• SM101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman
• The Control Book by Peter Masters
• The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren
• The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.
• The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.
• The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino
• This Curious Human Phenomenon: An Exploration of Some Uncommonly Explored Aspects of BDSM by Peter Masters
• Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook by Christina Parker

Daddies? Little Girls?

Hey there blog... look I am not dead.

I still sort of struggle with how littles are sometimes viewed by greater kink and I am not fully out nor really fully organized with my indemnity in it. There are people who know I enjoy playing like a little girl but not everyone.

How does being a little make me feel/think?-I am usually more relaxed because I only really act like one when I feel safe and loved. I enjoy feeling childish and a little bratty. I get to act out in the ways I would never do in my day to day. Overall in my real life I am pretty put together and am the one who takes care of everyone and everything.  Growing up I was the oldest and was the adult very early on. I feel like being a little releases me for the stress of being the best and fixing everything, because I know I will be taken care of. That is sort of a big deal to me.

I also like the idea of Daddy/little girl and find it very different in idea from daddy/daughter like thoughts and play. Its this weird mix of love and play but also the idea of old school leather Daddy and his boy. (only I am a girl and am a cis-girl) I have always been drawn to that dynamic and my play has always been a mix of that a being treated like that and being treated a little kid depending on what we are doing.  I really don’t like the way of thinking of Daddy/daughter play. That’s a taboo that grosses me out, and it seems from what I have read to be less about consent than I would like. I mean I like playing out con-non-con sometimes too but the incest feeling of it bothers me too much.

As for the difference on what is shown in public I think that really depends on how well you know those public people. I would act radically different at say a flea party that I would at a friend’s house. I am not sure you are meaning about the way people act to others when they have those rolls. I don’t think people act all that different unless that’s their game. Example if  a couple has protocol you can tell that’s what they want to show, if not then they still may have that dynamic but just don’t show it in the same way. Same with Daddies and their Girls if their game is to show certain acts that make them both happy or wet  (like teasing a little about something to make them squirm or a girl begging and bothering her daddy to do something) then you can tell that is their dynamic, but you can still have a Daddy/girl dynamic and not have it readily read by others. A lot of the actions that happen between this particular type of couple happens with all types of Dom/sub relationships.

I am rarely made uncomfortable unless there are sharp things involved, I am worried about the consent, or its just too violent for my taste (thug play).  I have been surprised a couple of times by things but I have not really gone to any Big/little get togethers.